Error page ideas

These are ideas for the static (well, ssi maybe) pages from nginx. If possible, check for a body from the backend and use that, otherwise send a self contained static page (light on the css, no js).

Use the 4xx/5xx split ("It's not me it's you"/"It's not you it's me"), a custom description of the specific error, and advice on what to try next. Include a transaction ref (maybe).

400 - Bad request - "You've done something so generically wrong that I can't tell what it was." 401 - Should be issued by a backend with content, can't do much with it at the proxy. 403 - Forbidden - "Your provided credentials do not permit access to this page. Please wait while I summon a security enforcement team to your location" 404 - Not Found - "You asked for a page that isn't here. This page is here instead." 405 - Method not permitted - "You can't $method this page!" 413 - Content to large - "You've sent more data than that page can cope with"

500 - Server error - "I think something has wrong gone." 501 - Not implemented - "I don't even understand the question." 502 - Bad Gateway - "I asked a friend for the page but they've let me down." 503 - Service unavailable - "I am far to busy to talk to you" 504 - Gateway timeout - "I asked a friend for the page but they're taking to long."

I wonder how much trouble it's going to be to get nginx to pick a random line from a set.